Age - 25 Primadonna Girl

by - 12:41 PM

I feel like its only fitting that I do my age 25 post a year to the day I finished my legendary shoe closet. Well, the day my husband finished it technically.


Ohhhhhhh, man! Age 25 was an outstanding year for me. Our house took many months to build. It took almost a year since we were one of the first homes to sell. When we looked at the house, I immediately fell in love with the closet. Around my 25th birthday, we had been moved in to the house for a while. And I still had not really done much of anything with the closet. Around this time last year, I volunteer furloughed so I had some time off work to do other projects around my house.

I had this vision for a closet that had colored lighting and many racks of shoes. I described it to hubby and he thought I was a little loony. LOL. But, he always supports my dreams. After some research I figured out a great way to cut costs and still achieve my vision. I'm very good at envisioning....but terrible at implementation. My husband, is incredibly talented in this area.

I've always loved shoes and had my own unique style. My dear friend Frank was telling me how he remembers when girls would make fun and bully. There are always narcissistic bullies that think only THEY are experts in in a subject. I've even had someone say my shoe addiction is fake or a phase. As if there is a legitimate reason to fake such a thing.

Well, heres the thing. I know what I want and I work for it. In my early 20's I was going to college and delivering pizza. I literally did not have a legitimate reason to wear heels. No matter how much I drooled over them. I mean, sure when I would go to church...that was about the only time. But, it wasn't like I was going clubbing or had a job that would warrant heels. Because all I cared about was being successful and established enough to have not one pair of heels, but as many as I want.

No, I didn't just one day wake up and say "I'm going to pretend to like shoes for no apparent reason whatsoever."

Not at all. When I started my collection, I was a career girl living in downtown. I had a town home while I was waiting for my house to build. Once me and my husband snagged the careers we wanted, we really had more money than we knew what to do with. It was nights out in the town, wine tasting and fancy dinners every weekend. We became regulars at so many places they would bring our drinks to the table before we even ordered. Nails and toes done every week! We were child free, and loooooving it. I would go to work in a different pair of heels. Everyone knew me for always having my shoes on point. We traveled to the caribbean and visited the Mayan Ruins. It was bucket list express. In the past couple years we were punching out goals on our bucket list left and right. It was fantastic.

Sure, if you want to consider my shoe addiction a phase...thats fine. But isn't that what life is about? Transitioning and evolving. I guess I feel sorry for people that stay in a perpetual cycle of the same mentality for years. Sorry, but I evolve.

Back then, the mailman used to make fun of me and say, "You have too much money." Because I was enjoying indulging in my shoe craze. Looking back I think I was a little crazy. But I'm so thankful I got to have one amazing year of being selfish and pampering myself. Your early 20's are your ME years. I had no responsibilities then, other than to make sure my shoe packages arrived on time.  I think it was extra important to have this year of doing all the things that I wanted to do. Once you have kids, your life should at least be respectful to them. And I don't want to chase freedom I never allowed myself before having kids.
Which is why I picked the theme Primadonna Girl. This year was about indulgence and being free of regret and responsibility. I loved it.

After I built my closet it was such a transitional time for me. I had put it on my vision board of an amazing shoe closet. But to be honest, people are more amazed by my husbands love and devotion to me. I feel like I'm more amazed that I have a husband who is not only talented but gives me the kind of love that people search forever for. It hasn't always been easy. But he adores me to the core.

I remember when I was little, my dad used to always pick me up after school and do his deposits at the Bank of the West in downtown. It was a weird security bank where you had to turn in your keys before entering. Weird. Anyway, I used to always tell my dad I wanted to work in downtown and wear fancy heels. I was always motivated and a hustler since I was a child. I valued intellect above all.

And here I was, many years later. Within walking distance from work, finally the woman I aspired to be.

A lot of people say, "Do the job you love and you'll never work a day in your life." I disagree with that. I like to do the job that no one wants to do. The hard stuff. You'll find there is so much joy and opportunity when you do the shit that no one wants to do.

My parents were musicians and business owners. I swore I could never live such a chaotic life. I love my government job, where I am appreciated. I love my job because I am stress free, well paid and secure. Not everyone can be the tax lady and not everyone can or wants to be CEO. Thats what makes life so wonderful. I love the quality of life my career has allowed me to enjoy. And for crying out loud, I have multiple commercial spots for crazy my shoe collection!

It blows my mind that millions of people have seen me, my shoes and closet. That a silly tax lady from Fresno, Ca was silly enough to find herself in a position like that. I got to be a princess for a day. I got the celebrity treatment. Everyone knowing my name and pampering me. But man, it was also hard work. Nerve wrecking work. And to be honest, it made me thankful for the career I have and the simple life I have with my IT nerd husband.


Dreams are a penny a plenty. But taking risks and doing the things you love will take a lot more effort. I remember growing up with a small closet I shared with my sister. I dreamed of what life would be like with pink, shoes and camera men everywhere.

And as amazing as it was. I have to say I don't think much of it.....

I'd rather be snuggled up on my husbands chest and smelling his beard. I'd rather be eating at our favorite sushi place together. I'd rather talk about how much were going to love our kids, and how lucky we are to have it ALL. I don't yearn or need for anything. My husband is the best thing in my life. And I feel that once you focus on love everything else in your life (money, security and happiness) all falls into place. Don't worry about having a plan, it will come to you like a magnet.

I don't care to feel important or driven by ego. Love is and has been the most important thing to me. But I mean, Shoes are awesome to.


Life Lessons: 
Know when it's time to settle down. You can't be selfish forever. An extravagant life can be just as boring as a simple life. But having true love, being kind and humble is ultimately the only think that can bring true happiness. 

What I wish I Knew Then: 
That filming a commercial/being on tv is very hard work and not as glamorous as it seems. That I have the best life ever being a tax lady with a silly shoe addition and married to the most perfect man on the planet. 
Marina Song: 

PRIMADONNA - Marina and the Diamonds
Primadonna girl, yeah
All I ever wanted was the world
I can't help but I need it all
The primadonna life, the rise and fall
You say that I'm kinda difficult
But it's always someone else's fault
Got you wrapped around my finger, babe
You can count on me to misbehave

Primadonna girl,
Would you do anything for me?
Buy a big diamond ring for me?
Would you get down on your knees for me?
Pop the pretty question right now, baby
Beauty queen on a silver screen
Living life like I'm in a dream
I know I've got a big ego
I really don't know why it's such a big deal, though

And I'm sad to the core, core, core
Every day is a chore, chore, chore
When you feel of a whole more more
I wanna be adored
'Cause I'm a primadonna girl, yeah
All I ever wanted was the world
I can't help that I need it all
The primadonna life, the rise and fall
You say that I'm kinda difficult
But it's always someone else's fault
Got you wrapped around my finger, babe
You can count me to misbehave

Primadonna girl fill the void, up with Celluloid
Take a picture, I'm with the boys
Get what I want 'cause I ask for it
Not because I'm really that deserving of it
Living life like I'm in a play
In the lime light, I want to stay
I know I've got a big ego
I really don't know why it's such a big deal, though

Going up, going down, down, down
Anything for the crown, crown, crown
With the lights dimming down, down, down
I spin around

'Cause I'm a primadonna girl, yeah
All I ever wanted was the world
I can't help that I need it all
The primadonna life, the rise and fall
You say that I'm kinda difficult
But it's always someone else's fault
Got you wrapped around my finger, babe
You can count on me to misbehave

Primadonna girl, yeah
All I ever wanted was the world
I can't help that I need it all
The primadonna life, the rise and fall
You say that I'm kinda difficult
But it's always someone else's fault
Got you wrapped around my finger, babe
You can count on me to misbehave
Primadonna girl

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