Age 18 - Teen Idle

10:12 AM

*****DISCLAIMER*****
I feel compelled to put a disclaimer. The song that I chose is depicting how sad life would be if I would have chosen to be rebellious. Teen Idle is talking about wasting youth and that time in adolescence where we are completely ignorant and make all the wrong choices. So, translate those lyrics for how you will...But it has a special message to me.


Things Remembered: 
I remember working the entire summer! Tire hauling and cleaning rims for my dad. Me and my mom would wake up at 6 in the morning to and I would jog up and down the stadium stairs and she walk the track for a mile. I always listened to the Beatles when I ran on my iPhone. OMG the iPhone came out...my parents bought me one because I was a complete and total spoiled kid. Well, not really...we just made a lot of money in rims that I worked on and sold for metal salvaging. The economy had just taken tank. So metal was worth nearly $800 a ton, aluminum in particular. After our jogs, I would eat a healthy lunch. Then go strait to work and clean rims for hours. Sounds horrible, but it was a lot of fun! It was addicting. My mom would give me 10% of whatever we made. So if each carload was $800, I would get 80. Talk about an awesome summer job! I save all of my money of course. I knew I wouldn't qualify for financial aid. I was AlWAYS dirty and my face was always sweaty. However, I was the happiest and healthiest I had ever been. 

School started and most everyone around me noticed my change. I dressed in brighter colors my hair was polished and I wore light, tasteful make up. I ended up losing a lot of band friends. I ended up getting suspended and removed from band because me and my friend Abraham AkA T.J. made prank calls to people and the school got wind of it. YES, I got suspended for something I did on a WEEKEND. It actually brought me a lot of notoriety in school, people in support that I should not have been suspended. People that thought it was "cool"...kind of funny in retrospect. So part of my punishment was being removed from band. After that, I had my first "serious" boyfriend. Blue-eyed country boy, played football and had an absolutely amazing family. I spent a lot of time with his family. His mother taught me how to cook. I learned a lot from them. He was great because he would help me with rims. I started making MORE friends, not NEW friends...people that were always afraid to approach mean Crissy were "cool" with me. I just absorbed everything like a sponge. It was the ideal senior year. I did everything I could, when I could and tried hard to be ME. Some people liked me, some people didn't. But, I was finally ME. 

The last part of my senior year is picking College classes. I picked a "6:30 am" because I had been so used to waking up early I wanted to take my classes early. That one thing would change my life completely.....

Life Lessons: 
Never hold back who you are to try to fit a mold. That once you are YOU and once you are happy, you will attract the right people and life is just easy. Absorb every moment at 18... solely live in the moment. Make good choices and stay innocent as long as you can. 

What I Wish I knew Then:
I don't necessarily wish I knew something in particular. Other than, make sure you put gas in the Chevy every day. Also I wish I could have told myself, "You did the right thing, good job kid. "



Marina Song: 
I chose Teen Idle - Marina and the Diamonds

Why? Her lyrics are so powerful and she really gives light to the ugly teen years some live and that I (thankfully) rejected. Also, back to how age 16 were my worst teen years. How I wish I would have lived the way I did at 18...at 16. How my mentality completely changed...


I wanna be a bottle blonde
I don’t know why but I feel conned
I wanna be an idle teen
I wish I hadn’t been so clean

I wanna stay inside all day
I want the world to go away
I want blood, guts and chocolate cake
I wanna be a real fake

Yeah, I wish I’d been a, wish I’d been a teen, teen idle
Wish I’d been a prom queen fighting for the title
Instead of being sixteen and burning up a bible
Feeling super, super (super!) suicidal
The wasted years, the wasted youth
The pretty lies, the ugly truth
And the day has come where I have died
Only to find I’ve come alive

I wanna be a virgin pure
A 21st century whore
I want back my virginity
So I can feel infinity

I wanna drink until I ache
I wanna make a big mistake
I want blood, guts and angel cake
I’m gonna puke it anyway

Yeah, I wish I’d been a, wish I’d been a teen, teen idle
Wish I’d been a prom queen fighting for the title
Instead of being sixteen and burning up a bible
Feeling super, super (super!) suicidal
The wasted years, the wasted youth
The pretty lies, the ugly truth
And the day has come where I have died
Only to find I’ve come alive
Come alive, I’ve come alive

I wish I wasn’t such a narcissist
I wish I didn’t really kiss
The mirror when I’m on my own
Oh, God! I’m gonna die alone
Adolescence didn’t make sense
A little loss of innocence
The ugly years of being a fool
Ain’t youth meant to be beautiful?

Yeah, I wish I’d been a, wish I’d been a teen, teen idle
Wish I’d been a prom queen fighting for the title
Instead of being sixteen and burning up a bible
Feeling super, super (super!) suicidal
The wasted years, the wasted youth
The pretty lies, the ugly truth
And the day has come where I have died
Only to find I’ve come alive
Only to find I’ve come alive
Only to find I’ve come alive
Come alive

Feeling super, super, super!
Feeling super, super, super!
Feeling super, super, super!
Come alive




You Might Also Like

0 comments

recent posts

Sponsors

Join Shoedazzle